it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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