We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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