it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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