Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
My bed is full of blood and feathers
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
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