Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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