I got chris browned last night
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
