he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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