i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
