No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Everclear isn't food dammit
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
