What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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