I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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