Hey man sorry I got all grabby
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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