You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
