bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
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