But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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