wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
this just has baby written all over it
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
