i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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