I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
i out mim tonsoeep
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