did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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