he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
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