idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
