i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
