i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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