Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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