I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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