Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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