AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Congratulations! We have a period
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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