her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
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