The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
