Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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