Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
