she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
