i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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