sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize