Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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