not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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