We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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