I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
