it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
