But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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