I should be sponsored by Trojan
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
