fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
