Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
