Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize