he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize