...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize