so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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