a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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