well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
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