But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
