Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
